I love my mother dearly. She is intelligent and witty and really nice (if she likes you.) But sometimes she has days where she says the strangest things. Today, for example.
1. "No, there is East Germany and West Germany, they are two separate countries.
Germany has been a single country for over twenty years.
2. "So what is the difference between LSD and meth, anyway?
on a similar note:
"I don't think I've ever met anyone who has tried cannabis."
You lived in Queenstown during the seventies. You probably have.
3. "So America has Republicans and Democrats, and one is right wing and one is left wing, right?"
Yes! She gets it!
"And Obama is right wing, so he must be a Democrat."
So close.
4. "The hippies never had much of a drug culture. They were too busy having free love to have time to try drugs."
This is the closest to an accurate statement she has made today. That and "I saved you some pizza because I thought you would be hungry."
5. "I don't think there's ever any reason for anyone to get divorced. Oh god, you're father's put the dishes away wrongly again, I swear one of these days I'll get a divorce..."
Abuse, cheating... and putting away the dishes incorrectly. I'll keep it mind for future relationships.
6. "Are you addicted to P?" (Ice, crystal meth, whatever you prefer to call it.)
The strongest stimulant I have ever tried is caffeine. So no, not a raging P addict. Sorry mum.
7. "What are you addicted to?"
Ok mum, I'm sorry. I should have told you this before. I'm totally addicted to cheese. And maybe Reddit.
Hopefully she will be better after a nap.
(For all those concerned, I'm not sure where this addiction obsession has originated. Maybe she heard something about addictive personalities on the radio. Maybe she read an article in the Listener. Who knows. She went through this phase a few years ago where she was convinced I had coeliacs disease, and that was less than pleasant.)
